The wind outside is blowing, but in a special way. It ebb’s and flows like an ocean breathing. As I sit in my chair, listening to a music playlist I designed for writing, I can’t help but stop moving my fingers and listen to the wind-dance happening right outside. If I were tired, it would lull me to sleep. I could easily be transported to a beach-side house, reading my book to the sounds of the waves breaking over the sand.
The day begins after a long sleep, Doctors orders. I find that in these times of seclusion from work and everyone else who is busy working away the day, is where I find the most introspection. I used to have them regularly before finding my job. Now, I have to make time. Today, time found me. I can’t say that I got sick because I worked too hard, or because in my free time I was helping out somewhere, or doing this/that. Sometimes these things just happen. That’s it. Still, a good friend, Taylor Birkey gave me some great advice today. “I’ve found He always has very specific things to reveal during times of illness. Let Him have your full attention.”
I read that, and dwelled on it. I haven’t ever found sickness to be a medium to connect with God, personally. Regardless, I stayed in that place. I tried to just be still. Be quiet. Be attentive. Breathe.
This was right about the time I noticed the wind. How it sounded like an ocean surf. How it calmed me. And even though the past three days had been pretty horrible, painful, and grey (and I don’t just mean with me. It has been windy and rainy for a week) I praise Him in the storm. It’s not only when good happens in our lives that He deserves us. In the end, He is still on the throne, and he still died for me. He deserves me even in the storm.