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The move.

I’m moving to Colorado.

I mentioned something like this happening in a previous post. Since knowing that I would be moving back to the U.S., I’ve been looking at places that would not only be most likely to have a job for my career in Social Work but a place that I could hang my head for a while.

After hearing a word from God that after I get back to the states, I am supposed to s l o w down and stop moving around so much, I decided to listen. With that knowledge in mind, I started feeling a strong pull towards Colorado but didn’t really know why. All I knew was that I needed to find some work.

Being at home has been an incredible gift and I love my parents so much for their willingness to help in my time of need. My plan when moving back home was always to find work not matter where I found it. Since January 2016, this was the plan. But again, I couldn’t get Colorado out of my head for some reason.

As I began to send out feelers to the Rocky Mountain State, I started to get bites and interviews and friends were giving me contacts and things started coming together. I began to get peace about what God told me ages ago, “Find a place, stop moving, do some good, help others, be happy.” I felt like this was the place I was supposed to land.

A few weeks ago, I made the decision, much like I did when I went out to New Zealand, to pack my things and move. It’s difficult to say how long I’ll be gone, as it was with New Zealand, but I know that I’m trying to start something there. I leave March 6th. For some, this is brand new information. I’m sorry. For those in my community who know, I’ve appreciated the prayers in my transition, and the help getting there.

I’m bad with goodbyes. Actually, I do them quite well, I just don’t do them well in large groups. Sorry. I’m sad. I’m happy. I’m grateful, appreciative, and guarded. I’ll be honest. It hasn’t been easy to be myself this past year, and I’m sorry for that. Truly. Still, I’ve found peace and happiness in my year back with you all. Know that I am excited for the unknown ahead, as much as I am anxious. I travel with God and with the knowledge that God is moving, I just need to follow.

Feel free to hit me up if you’re ever in the Mile High area, I’d be more than happy to show you around/house you. (When I get a place) haha

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A History of Love

It’s Valentines soon. The last time I wrote a post on this topic was quite a while ago. Still, it seems that I drift back to it every once and a while. I thought I would take a diversion and try a slightly exciting and vulnerable experiment.

As far back as I can remember, I’ve always been a romantic. Most depictions of kids in movies showed them afraid of girls or thought they had “cooties.” For that remedy, I needed two circles and two dots, then I got my cootie shot. That sort of thing. Haha. It’s funny to think back to my life when I was a child, but on a holiday like this, I thought it was particularly appropriate.

My first crush was when I was very young. I was 6 years old and I was in the 1st grade. I didn’t waste time. I had my future to look to after all. Her name was Julie Mattic. I sat next to her in class. She lived fairly close to my house, in my neighborhood, and she was also on the same bus I was riding. I had a crush on her for what seemed like years. I have a very strong memory of Michael Danaher making fun of me because I chose to sit next to Julie in class. He said I liked Julie. This was true, but I was still embarrassed. I didn’t want everyone else knowing about it! Being a ginger isn’t easy when you get embarrassed because your face turns red fairly quickly. Genetics didn’t help me hide many emotions.

The next crush I remember having was in the 2nd grade to Caitlin Leisen. She was the kind of girl that all the guys wanted to get the attention of. I remember one day, we were passing our end-of-the-year yearbooks around so that your friends could sign them. This was a big deal. The more you got, the cooler you were. Caitlin’s turn was next. he wrote her name in my book and circled it with a heart. In the heart, in very small writing, as if she was trying to make sure no one saw what she wrote, she scribbled, “I like you.” I felt on top of the world. You have to remember, as a child, crushes and who likes who was a very common thing to be happening on the school yard. Gossip and talk ran the town. I felt very special.

I remember a game being played on the blacktop that was played from 1st grade to pretty much to the 4th grade. The rules: Chase the girls. That’s it. The girls would understand the game and play along. They would run and the boys would try to catch them. There would sometimes be a massive flock of boys following 3 girls. Sometimes there would only be 1 girl running, dodging, and escaping the horde. Caitlin was sometimes one of these girls. Every once and a while the girl would stop to catch her breath and the boys would just circle or stand there while she rested…because it wasn’t, “catch the girl” it was, “chase the girl.” Then without warning, she would race off and the boys would pursue her like birds.

I remember playing “chase” one or twice, but eventually stopped and just played kickball, basketball, or the occasional soccer game that was underway. I guess I never really understood the point of “chase” from an early age, haha.

Nothing really ended up happening with Caitlin, after all, I was only 7. What was the next possible step? haha. Then there was Taylor Brown. For pretty much 3rd grade till the 8th grade, I liked Taylor. In the 5th grade, we were in the same class and became really good friends. Taylor had a boyfriend at that time. His name was Kyle. Kyle became fairly jealous of how well I was getting along with Taylor. I found that pretty darn hilarious. Still, the reality was that I was friend zoned pretty hard. I thought about telling Taylor how I felt in the 6th or 7th grade, but I was petrified and let the moment slip past. Also as a red-haired child, my self-confidence was brought down more than a few pegs by those who thought it would be fun to point out a very obvious trait about myself…over and over again.

At this point, we start drifting away from young, careless, hilarious love, and into the teenage, awkward, avalanches of…awkwardness. Yeah. I think the snowball metaphor does justice to this stage of life.

I just think it is funny to think back on the very young, very average Eric, getting by, and crushing on girls at such a young age. I can’t help but laugh.

I ran into Caitlin again when I was a teenager. I was shadowing my mom for a school project, and my mom was working as a substitute teacher at my old elementary school. I don’t know why she was there, but I can assume it was for the same project at her own high school. I hadn’t seen Caitlin since Elementary school and it was weird. As soon as I saw her, butterflies jumped into my stomach and I was immediately self-conscious. I was 7 years old again. I’m not sure if she recognized me, but I remembered that encounter so vividly. I was immediately brought back to the second grade when she signed my yearbook and handed it back to me smiling. Funny.

Was it Love? No. Not even close. It was infatuation. It was a crush. It was a rush of feelings, for which I’ve never been in short supply of. It was an obsession cocktail of adrenaline, dopamine, and serotonin, one that I would later learn the true pitfalls of. We like these feelings. We LOVE these feelings. When they say that it’s not far off from taking cocaine, there’s a reason. We LOVE the feelings associated with liking someone. They feel great!

So this St. Valentines Day, reflect on your days of youth and just thank God that you’ve grown oh-so-much since then, haha. Not without lessons and hard falls, but growth is something to celebrate. Happy Day today and show some love.

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One Year, Looking Back

One year ago I was excited to see all of my friends again and live with my family after 3 years of seperation. I was anxious about the transission, after living in New Zealand for that long, but I was happy none-the-less to be back home.

Looking back feels weird to me. It doesn’t feel like I’ve been back for 365 days now. The time feels more like months have passed rather than a full year. I have made good use of that time being with friends, traveling to places I’ve never gone before, meeting new people, making new friends, reuniting with old ones, continuing old traditions, and eating ALL the good food, haha. Continue reading “One Year, Looking Back”

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President Donald J. Trump Explained

He’s arguably one of the most liked and equally disliked people in the country right now. I know reading back on this, that fact might change either way, but as of January 2017, at the beginning of his Presidency and first term…he’s made some very bold and unfavorable moves.

Continue reading “President Donald J. Trump Explained”

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Memories II

Three years ago, I began transcribing memories. The memories had no real order, I would just sit in front of my laptop and type anything that came to my head. I ended up writing over 15 pages worth of memories, and I figured they will be something special to look back on someday.

Last night, I had a memory that was so pure and beautiful, that I felt obliged to share it with you all. I was driving home at night. The radio DJ may have given me some guidance on the subject matter, as I think he was talking about a childhood memory, but I can’t remember the subject matter of the story. Anyway…

Continue reading “Memories II”